A discourse about politics... and being a Thatcher.

*Notice* The statements and opinions made in this blog entry are solely the views and opinions of the author. No harm or criticism is intended, even if it seems to be implied.

I'm coming to realize something. Something I knew a long time ago, but forgot this past year. I hate politics. Now this might surprise some of you given some of my debates and discussions with you, but it's true. I get so worn down by debating and fighting and picking sides. BLEH! I want to like everyone. I want to live and let live. Can't we all just get along? Or is asking that a trait of a bleeding heart liberal?

What brings about this self-reflection you ask? Well, first I don't like feeling as if I've hurt, or offended others. I know it doesn't bother some, but it does me. I like a good snark as well as the next gal, but snark isn't my natural state. My natural state is that of the big sister. The shoulder to cry on. The listening ear. I hate being the one who goes on a rant about this or that policy, or political or radio or television figure. So I like Obama. I know most of you think he's the anti-Christ, but I just find him likable, and many other positive attributes that I'll refrain from listing. BUT I just read an article my cousin Robbie sent me about Rush Limbaugh, and guess what? It made me understand the man a little more. I'm not suddenly flipping sides and agreeing with the things he says, but my boiling loathing eased a bit. I saw his humanity. Where he's coming from. The talent he possesses to do what he does. It impressed me, I admit.

I guess it's the hallmark of naivety, but I would love it if politics didn't have the bite and negativity it does. It makes me feel sick inside. I know people think I'm crazy for feeling the way I do. That somewhere I must have lost my way. But honestly, I feel it is my ability to look at someone and try to walk a mile in their shoes that has brought me to my current beliefs; right or wrong. Constantly questioning myself and why I believe what I do. And in dealing with opposing views I've thought long and hard about what makes people have the political leanings they do. Where they are coming from, where they are headed and how that affects their politics.

I'm sure having an atheist husband might color my thoughts about how others outside my belief system view the world. It has taught me that just because I wholeheartedly believe one way, it doesn't negate or deny the right of another to exercise that same freedom to believe as they choose. It is a golden rule type of situation. I want those of other beliefs to treat me with dignity and respect, and because of this, I MUST afford them the same respect. And isn't example is the best way to teach those principles I hold dear? But by debating my politics am I showing what I believe by example? No. I'm just at loggerheads with people I love.

One problem I'm facing is the discussion of politics is some of the only contact I've had with some of my family since we were children. The only thing that makes me interesting to them is my political affiliation. It sets me and my sisters apart from the Thatcher throng. I mean, we're the odd ones. We didn't live on the farm, we were entirely too emotional to be tolerated and we just didn't quite “fit” in the family. Or that's how I've felt a lot of the time. I'm intensely proud to be a Thatcher though. I think it's something that comes from having your name blazed across the front page of the local news paper in big, bold letters, “THATCHER'S SUE THE COUNTY.” It felt like we really had to band together. Us verses them. We're stick to our guns kind of people. And you know, I'm proud of my family and the things they have accomplished. Though I wonder how I got none of those brassy, go out there and take the world by the horns genes. I do think I got the Thatcher love of conversation and discussion. And we have an acute curiosity about the world and love of travel. Or that's something I've observed. We're also deeply passionate. I got that trait. I like that trait.

But we can also be bullheaded and egotistical. *ouch* Prone to bragging, pride and condescension. *double ouch* We are also prone to generalizing complexities... which is what I just did. My main purpose in pointing that out is because they are truly MY faults and weaknesses in this matter. They are what have brought me here, at 3:30 in the morning reflecting on my comments and why I even care enough to continue debating.

I'll tell you why. Because I'm too stubborn and too proud to be silent. Because I think know my stuff and I enjoy saying it in a way that makes my immediate family laugh for days. Perhaps this is how to win friends and influence people, but it's like Rex says in Toy Story, “I was going for fearsome, but I don't think I'm coming across. I'm afraid I'm just coming off as annoying.” That the family is just looking at me, shaking their head saying, “Jackass.” I guess I also view it as an un-Thatcher-istic trait to even care what they think. *sigh*

The real question is, even with this realization, that at my core I hate this, I won't be able to resist the lure of the debate. Can I abide standing silent when I profusely disagree with something? Or will the draw be too seductive. The conversation too appealing. The argument too easy to make? Is it even possible for me to give it up cold turkey?

And round and round we go. It's brutal and ugly, and who wins? I haven't seen a winner yet. Each side thinks they do, but how do you win if you continue to run round and round the mulberry bush? No one ever changes their mind, we just think the other is, at best, deluded. At worst judged as misled, or even wicked. That really lights my fire and gets me riled. But that just illustrates that I'm just a big baby and don't like people thinking less of me because of who I voted for. I'm still me. I'm still a good person.

I'm confident that our current political system won't be kept when the Savior returns. We won't be divided into Democrat and Republican. I'd be willing to guess there would be parts of each party's philosophy incorporated, but the sting and bite would be gone. Wouldn't that be wonderful? But of course it's simpler to unite when the Savior is at the head of things. All we have now are imperfect men and women, with imperfect ideas, imperfect implementation, and an imperfect world. Man, it would be nice if we could take the greed and pride and ambition out of all of that. We'd sure be better off, wouldn't we?

So, I hate politics. I hate always having my dukes up, being more than willing to throw that last punch and possibly even kick 'em when their down. It makes the bile rise in my throat. At times it even makes me want to cry, but I've always been too emotional like that.